The Gift of Encouraging Words

For a number of years, I worked as a behavior specialist. If a child struggled with challenging behavior, I supported them by providing strategies and resources to the adults in their lives.

We focused on areas such as following directions, managing aggressive behaviors, and engaging in appropriate social interactions. I spent a great deal of time observing situations, collecting data, developing plans, modeling interventions, and attending meetings—all important parts of the process. 

Approaches to suit the child

In one former position, I wrote a handful of social narratives with photos, personalized so that a child could better understand the expectations for an aspect of their daily lives. For example, if a child struggled with transitioning from recess back into the classroom, I wrote a social narrative specifically for that situation. That way, before recess, the child could review the narrative that explained the transition; acknowledged the feelings associated with the end of playtime; and provided coping skills the child could use. 

These written narratives were similar to picture books and allowed for some creativity, so I enjoyed developing and sharing them with young people. However, this task accounted for a miniscule percentage of my time in this job.

Well-timed message

A couple of years after leaving this position, someone I’d worked alongside sent me a text out of the blue that said:

 “You taught me well. Today I am you.” 

That former colleague’s text was accompanied by a picture of a social narrative she’d written. I was surprised because, even though writing these narratives wasn’t a large part of my job, my coworker associated them with me. What’s more, she had no idea that I wrote picture books and children’s novels in hopes of having them published. And that, on the same morning, I had received yet another rejection letter for one of my manuscripts. 

I knew many writers received loads of ‘passes’ on their work while journeying toward publication, but this particular rejection had burrowed in my brain and sowed doubt. I could never stop writing, but maybe my writing wasn’t at the level required to be sold on shelves? Maybe I’d stop my pursuit?

An offer instead of a pass

After my former coworker’s text, however, my thinking changed. If writing social narratives made her think of me… and if that small part of my job was memorable to her… maybe I should keep sending out my work? And not long after that, I received a letter from a publisher that was an offer – instead of a pass.

This colleague’s words – likely sent without knowing how meaningful they would be – were an enormous gift of encouragement that arrived just at the right moment. 

Words that reach out to affirm, to praise, or simply to say ‘Hi’ in an authentic way…these are some of the best gifts I’ve been given. 

We have no way of knowing when our words will be a gift that arrives at exactly the right time. So—let’s keep sending them out into the world.