How Kid-Friendly Appetizer Dinners Brought Our Family Closer

For many parents, the question, “What’s for dinner?” is not always welcome, particularly when life’s extra busy with work and family responsibilities.

When our kids were young, my husband and I focused on making simple, nutritious main dishes; we never thought about appetizers. And if schedules were especially challenging, we’d sometimes go to restaurants or buy home-style takeout food.

Back then, our children were usually happy with what was served. And during many weekends, they’d help with meal prep, standing on chairs pulled up to the counter. A kid-friendly favourite was pizza; we enjoyed the sound of their chatting as our children scattered ingredients over the prepared dough.

Coping with children’s changing food tastes 

By the time our children moved into adolescence, however, their food tastes had changed. One child became a vegetarian (the lacto-ovo type), while the other declared herself a “meat-a-tarian.” One of us developed food sensitivities. And I stopped eating beef and frequently joined our vegetarian child in eating plant-based meals.

Over the next while, my family’s food tastes changed again. One of our kids gave veganism a try, which turned out to be a short-lived experiment. Then came new announcements about food dislikes: mushrooms; olives; uncooked tomatoes; cream sauces; and uncooked onions. Plus, during the first weeks back from overnight camp, they couldn’t even look at big-batch food like chili; spaghetti with tomato sauce; or hamburgers.  

To navigate changing preferences, I made a chart of who disliked what and stuck it on the fridge. My husband and I prepared dishes that avoided the offending ingredients. However, we didn’t prepare double meals because, as an aunt cautioned, “Never become a short-order cook.” And she was right: we didn’t want to spend even more time in the kitchen.

Over time, we grew to accept that not every meal will be a hit. That sometimes food is just fuel.

A kid-friendly appetizer spread helps during busy holidays

One chaotic December, when the kids were young teens, my husband and I struggled to get through our to-do lists. Dinner decisions were often low on the list. Sometimes, we’d fondly recall how, before having kids, we’d each take care of our own dinner. But the typical choices back then – such as tinned soup, cereal, or something from a box (hello, Kraft Dinner) – weren’t a great option for growing teens. 

One weekend we asked our kids for suggestions, and someone said, “How about a meal of appetizers?” Everyone liked the idea, agreeing that each of us would be responsible for making and serving a dish. 

For that first appetizer spread, we took turns preparing and serving the food. The meal gave everyone a chance to make something they’d enjoy and to get credit for their contribution. I remember that one dinner included veggie rice wraps with tofu, mango, and red pepper; warm spinach dip with parmesan and artichoke hearts; cauliflower bites; and broccoli quiche.

Those kid-friendly appetizer meals were such a success that we began having them more often. They helped build family togetherness and, even if a dish didn’t turn out well or wasn’t someone’s favourite, everyone appreciated the effort.

Getting children more involved in family cooking

As our kids got older and had enough free time, they became more involved in the kitchen. Someone would make cranberry sauce or candied yams for a Thanksgiving dinner; other favourite choices were cinnamon rolls and cookies.

Meanwhile, our appetizer spreads continued to be a popular choice. In fact, if I’d known how successful these meals would be, we’d have started them earlier: perhaps when the kids were 10, as a feature of family movie nights. 

Sharing the responsibility for meal preparation

It’s been a privilege to see our children’s cooking skills develop over the years. As they moved through their teens, it was reassuring to know that in the future – when sharing an apartment with roommates during university or afterwards – they’d be comfortable making food for themselves and friends. And they’d have an important skill to share in long-term relationships. We’re glad our kids saw both parents share in this ongoing and enjoyable, but demanding, responsibility.

Our children are older now, with jobs and partners. And when they invite us to their homes for dinner, we enjoy seeing how capable our kids are in the kitchen and tasting their delicious food. Knowing that their skills began years before, helped along by our family’s simple meals of appetizers.